By: Shelbi Henny

you've been tricked into cycles
stating over and under apologies
that stain and hold with aggression 
a backhanded deposition 
downplaying and exploding actions 
that surpass emotion 
and dipped into countless disrespect
losing grounds that leave eviction
and I drank there 
and I prayed here 
and I tore my identity
and spit into my own face
while repeatedly hearing the disgust
and trying to save 
because I felt I deserved this 
and I can no longer abandon the sentence 
yet naïve to the possibility that you studied
and reviewed prior infidelities in your favor  
to being so complacent 
there it is 
the place you loved so well 
the place you thrive in 
the place that create entities 
and fed well 
while souls drown in agony 
you tuck every victory
in reward because you deserve leverage
so save the apology that
only comes when sober